Hey everyone. It’s Renee, Yvonne, the Gen Sexologist. One of the questions I got this week was about women using sex toys. And the question was are women trying to replace us with sex toys? So let me just address that very quickly and talk about some things that I think are going on and try to address them.
So last summer, you all may remember there was a woman who talked about this sex toy by a company called Tracey’s Dog. If you haven’t seen the Amazon review, it is hilarious. And she talks about how her legs went straight out like a dead goat. She levitated, and she lost her sense of hearing and sight and everything else. So, and it was because of this toy. I will admit this toy is amazing. Okay. I actually own quite a few of these clitoral-sucking toys.
They are awesome. So I have this one, I have this, this is my favorite because it’s small and compact it’s by womanizer. There’s one called a Satisfier Curve. It’s really nice. Cause you can, it’s just nice. Anyway, there’s one by We-Vibe. This one is cool as well as this one, because they have apps so they can be controlled by your partner if you want or by you. And even this little one I found on Amazon, which hits just the clip anyway. Okay. So now it’s saying, Oh, that you probably just said, well, Renee, yeah, you replace us with toys. Right. But we cannot. So let me tell you the nice part about toys that I, I would like men to think about and why women use them is that it helps us to learn our own bodies and what feels good to us.
Most of us did not grow up with the positive aspect of sex. And that is touch yourself and you know, know what feels good to you. Usually when we did something like that and it may have happened to you too. If you were a young boy, but someone would just slap your hand away, “don’t do that.” Right? And as a kid, you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s not sexual. It just feels good. But we learned from a very young age not to do that. And so, whereas men grow up kind of being encouraged to do it. And especially since your genitals are outside of your body, you can see it. We don’t have that same type of relationship necessarily with our bodies. And we, in some cases are just learning them now in our forties and fifties, right. We’re just figuring out what some things are.
So one of the things that’s great about your partner, if they are female using toys is that she is learning who she is. She’s learning what feels good to her. And that’s one of the great things about all of these toys is that they’re stimulating. Like this one can stimulate the G-spot and it’s as you notice, it can it’s bendy. So it fits her body, which is really cool. And then this is also bendy and it can hit her clitoris. And this is great because you can adjust it to, she can adjust it to her body. So now that she knows what feels good, she can now explain to you what she would like you to do. So that’s one way to see the sex toys that your partner may have.
Now, the second thing that you could do with these sex toys is let’s say we’re all getting older, right? That’s why I’m the gin sexologist. I’m working with people who are 45, 50, 60 years old. We’re getting older. We don’t necessarily have the strength, the stamina, the desire to time to go all night as we did in our twenties, right? So this can help you as her partner get off quicker. That’s just being honest, right? So let’s say you’re not in for night or morning or an afternoon of just, you know, having sex for hours and hours on end. This can help her get what she needs when you get what you need. Okay. So you can use this on her. I like this one because it’s curved and it can be used between bodies and that’s, what’s really nice. And it hits the clitoral. It’s the quitters, which is really nice. Same thing for this one, which hits just the clitoris. I’m having such a hard time with that word. It hits the clitoris. And again could be used between bodies, if you’re in a missionary position, or if you’re in cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, anything like that, it can help with that. Now, this was harder. This is definitely not going to be something that the two of you can use necessarily together if you’re penetrating her, but it can be used while you do something else to her, right? So maybe you’re laying in bed, you’re playing with her breasts. You can do it, she can use this and get off that way. This also can be used between bodies because it’s very small and it’s compact. It’s a little loud, but it’s, it works. It does the job. So think of toys in that way, an opportunity for your partner to learn her body. And two is a chance for you to kind of take a break and still have your partner be satisfied and pleased at the end.
And there’s also a way to add in some, some fun, and some element into your sexual repertoire. If things have gotten a little boring, you can pull out a toy and try something new and you may find out wow she really likes that. Or she hates that. Now I have toys. I hate, I have a huge- one day I’ll show you pictures. I have a huge box of like.. it’s huge. It’s always, and I have some at the bottom because I plan to never ever use them, but I don’t want to throw them out because in my mind I’ve wasted money. Although I won’t use them, they’re just horrible. They feel horrible. They’re just horrible. I want to share them because somebody else might like them. Some, they made them for a reason, right? So somebody likes these. I don’t know who that’s not me, but somebody might.
And so this is an opportunity to find out what your partner likes, what feels good, gives you a break. It can bring you closer because you could talk about it. Shop for these online, go to, you know, when COVID’s over, go to a sex shop and go there together and try out something and say, Hey, you know what? Let’s, let’s try this out and see what it’s like tonight. It’s a chance for you to grow closer that way it is not to replace you. So no sex toys would not replace it because we still like to be kissed. And we like to be held and we like to be massaged. And we’d like to be licked and sucked on and all that stuff and toys don’t do that. They can get you to an orgasm quick, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s, it doesn’t, it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t mean that you’re being replaced in any way. It simply means that we’re learning our bodies and what feels good to us. And sometimes we just have these because
You Got insomnia and you need to get to sleep.
So I’ll see you next week. I’m Renee Yvonne the Gen Sexologist.
Bye.
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